random ramblings.

 /// God places the lonely in families. - ps. 68:8

I LOVE having a big family! I take them for granted a lot... it's pretty natural though right? we don't realize what we have until it's gone, this weekend a third of the fam went to Nashville for my grandpa's retirement party... I quickly remembered how hard it is to sleep at night without all of them accounted for! the house just seemed less chaotic and boring... don't get me wrong, I LOVE and value quiet time... because it's hard to come by in a house of a lot of people... but too much quiet is uncomfortable & unfamiliar. luckily, yesterday we were all accounted for again to celebrate mommy :) when I lived in Australia/Thailand it was the same thing, if I was by myself for too long, I felt like I was missing something or someone!  God knows our needs & knows exactly how to tend to them.... I like that.

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today I was listening to Kari Jobe stuck in traffic and Steady My Heart came on.... I think she wrote this song about me! seriously though, the lyrics are exactly what I was pondering/praying today.

Even when it hurts
Even when it's hard
Even when it all just falls apart
I will run to You
Cause I know that You are
Lover of my soul
Healer of my scars
You steady my heart

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*lately I'm learning that grasping Grace does not happen over night, it's basically a life long process until we reach the Kingdom! our ignorant human minds cannot and will not ever understand the mind of God and the fact that He would wash away our mistakes. also remembering that my past does not define my future! ah... seriously God, you won't hold my dumb moves against me?! You still choose to bless me beyond what I deserve, even when I mess up... daily!? crazy. been pondering Romans 6 too... go read it.